So Long Cowboy
by CronoCat
Summary: So long, Cowboy...and that was it: the end, finite, end of story. But, maybe, just maybe, it was only the beginning. And so the story after the story begins...and ends, as I have now completed it! YAY! =^_^= please r/r, thanx to everyone who reviwed me!!!
1. Default Chapter

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So long, Cowboy...and that was it: the end, finite, end of story. But, maybe, just maybe, it was only the beginning. When he thought back to that time of his life, Jet Black wondered how it had all begun. It was hard for him to remember exactly when he had started actually liking Faye and Spike and Ed and Ein. Or maybe it was more of a pondering about when he had started to like having them around or when he had finally been able to call them his friends to himself. When he looked in the mirror-something that he didn't like to do very often-something was different. Jet might still look the same from the outside, but something had changed and he wasn't the same person anymore. 

Idly, he donned his absurd apron and cooked up a storm, forgetful of the fact that he was cooking for only one person now. As he fiddled with the dial on the stove, Jet tried to think of what he could do now. He really wasn't a bounty hunter and, he admitted with a rueful grin, had never been one. At least, never a very good one. After all, it wasn't as if the Bebop crew had ever managed to dig up a significant amount of money by tracking down wanted people. With a noisy clatter, he set out the plates and dished out the food. "Spike, dinner! Faye...Ed...Ein, dinner!" He called absently and sat down. They were missing out on a good meal, he thought, shoveling the food into his mouth. When no one else appeared to help him eat, Jet moved on to Spike's plate, even though he really wasn't all that hungry. Massaging his head, he quietly put down the plate and dug into the next one. Faye's plate. Not that it mattered anymore. They were all gone. They had all left him eventually. He was alone again, the way that he had wanted to be for so long. But now that they-his crew, he thought with a grim smile-had gone, he wished they would come back. 

Jet remembered telling Spike that he finally understood why Spike didn't like "tomboys and rug rats". But here, in the ungodly silence, he knew that it wasn't exactly true. Because Jet _did _miss them and he _had_ liked Faye and Ed. It was too quiet here, not to mention dark. He stood up quickly, and leaving the plates out, set about fiercely cleaning all the light fixtures. Coughing in the shower of dust, Jet realized that Spike had also liked Faye and Ed, even if they _were_ the very category of people he claimed to despise. Sighing, Jet could see so clearly the event just a few days ago...or was it weeks? He was losing track of time, but that wasn't important anymore. _BYE BYE..._Ed had written with a picture of her face beneath. Jet figured he would never be able to forget that moment. He could still see the brilliantly red paint, shining slightly in the sunset and the silhouette of Spike as he stood there...silent and staring, his cigarette smoke floating and twisting in the air. There could be no doubt in that moment that Spike had grown to care for the little lost girl, a computer hacker who had managed to hack her way into the heart of the stoic Spike. But why would Ed, someone so completely on her own, choose a father who had forgotten her over the Bebop crew? Jet scratched his head again; family ties may be strong, but Ed's father had left her in day care for seven years and when he finally found her again, had disappeared to continue his "work". Jet still didn't trust him. He hoped Ed was all right. Her father hadn't even taken the time to learn if she was his daughter or his son, just thanked them for watching out for her and took off. It made Jet feel slightly sick, almost as though it was _his_ fault Ed had left. He should have been watching her more carefully, should have persuaded her to stay, should have, should have, should have. 

He stopped trying to clean the lights, because it was no use. He was just shifting the dust around the room and couldn't seem to focus anyways. He could have sat down and watched _Round Up_, but the guy had lost his job and his coworker was apparently getting married. Faye had seen the guy at the airport and had told Jet later. Everything is falling apart, she had said, trying not to cry. It's not just us, Jet...it's everyone. Nothing's will be the same. There won't be a bounty report anymore, but it won't matter, because Spike's going off to get himself killed and Ed already left with Ein. And then she turned away, so he wouldn't see the lone tear making it's slow pathway across her thin face. He wished he could reach out to her, but he didn't know how. Even after all this time, he hadn't known what to say or how to comfort her. At least, he had said slowly, knowing it wasn't the right thing to say, at least, you got your memory back. Faye shook her head, helluva lot of good that did me. It doesn't make any difference anymore. There's nothing to go back to anyways. And then she leaned against the wall, breathing deeply and trying to control her twitching hands. When Spike had finally come back for the last time, Faye had tried to stop him. But it didn't do any good and he hadn't ever expected it to. After all, Julia was dead and Spike loved her. There was no question in that. Jet shook his head and cleared off the table. He half expected Spike to saunter back on to the ship and announce laconically that he was hungry. But Jet knew Spike was dead...he could feel it practically. And Faye had known it too. After Spike had gone, she had stood in the same place for hours, crying softly. Every once in a while, Jet thought he caught the strains of an old lullaby, as if she were singing to herself. And once, as he was drifting into sleep, he heard her say softly, "go me..." just as she had in that old videotape. Something about that made him feel empty, as if he had just finished running a marathon or as if he had been crying for hours until there was nothing left. But the next morning, he had woken up to her incessant whining, as if everything was the same again. She made him get up and fix up her ship, along with breakfast. You're leaving. It wasn't a question, he just said it. Faye nodded, can't stay here. Jet shrugged, not sure how to respond. He could say, sure, stay, but it was clear she didn't want to anyways. Maybe I'll come back and visit you, she offered and stood up. Sure. Just give me a call and come back anytime, and he knew, for once, he had said the right thing. The way he had wanted to say it and Faye smiled, blinking rapidly. Thanks Jet...she whispered, struggling to hold herself together. It will be awfully quiet without you, Jet had said carefully. Does that mean you'll miss me? Faye teased and Jet smiled at her, of course. And stepped nearer to give her a hug. He could feel her thin frame shaking. But Faye was a strong person. She hugged him tightly and then slipped away. He watched her climb nimbly on to her ship and shut the hatch. Faye waved a cheery goodbye, brushed her hair out of her face and started up her ship. He had fixed the ship up and the engine purred smoothly, as if it were happy to be going again. I'll be around if you need me, she called and headed off to places unknown. Jet stood, smiling and waving and feeling like a complete idiot. _I shouldn't have let her go_, he thought. _I shouldn't have let any of them go. _Long after she had gone, he stood there, staring into the skies and thinking back to all the places they had gone. The five of them...now the one of him, Jet thought sadly and laughed at himself for feeling so unhappy. 

Eventually he went inside and walked the ship a couple times, unsure of what to do next. Smiling to himself, he debated whether he ought to climb up to attic and see where the old refrigerator had been. But Jet decided not to and continued walking. He laughed as he passed the bathroom, remembering how he and Spike had held Faye hostage in there. So many good memories, but that was all they were now. He was turning into a old geezer...ah, yes sonny. Those were the good old days, great times and mighty good memories. Yes sir...Gradually, his laughter turned to tears and he wiped them away angrily. Crying seemed so weak, he couldn't let anyone ever see him cry. The again, no one was here. No one would ever know and so the tears began to flow, a river flooding in the sadness of spring rain. He couldn't help wondering if somewhere Faye was also feeling miserable. _Maybe somewhere out there Ed was crying, wishing to be back aboard the Bebop and Spike-no,_ he thought, _Spike is dead. He doesn't feel any of this confounded loneliness. If only Spike would have listened...if only he would have tried to understand, if only he could have seen how much we all cared about him, if only he had known how much his departure would affect everyone, if only, if only, if only. _Jet was faced with a new problem: how does one solitary soul learn to enjoy being alone again? How does someone who only wanted to be left alone, begin to want that once more? It was too painful, letting yourself like people and become attached to them. He could understand Spike's attempts to keep a shield between himself and others. Jet didn't want to meet new people or hire a brand new crew to keep him company. All he wanted was Spike, Ed, Faye and Ein to come back. But Spike was gone forever. Jet supposed he could call the others back for a funeral, but he shuddered at the idea of them all sitting around like little old ladies and crying into hankies. Besides, Spike wouldn't have wanted a funeral anyways. He would have understood then if no one held any ceremonies in his honor. After all, they all missed him in their own way, were all grieving. Except maybe Ed, who didn't know and Ein, who wouldn't have been able to understand, being only a dog. _A dog..._Jet thought, _I could have a dog to keep me company. _But somehow, the thought didn't appeal to him. All he felt was utter exhaustion and so he went to the old beat up couch and fell asleep almost immediately. 

Later, in the middle of the night, he woke up abruptly. The silence was deafening and he could feel his heart racing. What was wrong? Something felt wrong...his heart pounded against his chest as he stood up and felt about for a light. A book of matches that Spike had thrown there after lighting a cigarette, were still on the table. Jet lit one and moved cautiously from room to room. It was lonely and infinitely more frightening being the only one here to investigate strange things. He peered carefully into Ed's room, noticing that she had taken everything. Something on the floor crunched beneath his shoe and he paused, peering carefully into the darkness. After a moment, he bent and picked it up, realizing that it was a small, crushed piece of Ein's food. Except for that, the room was nondescript; completely devoid of feeling and evidence that a smart young girl and her dog had ever lived here. Sighing, he shut the door and continued on. 

Feeling around for the doorknob, he edged Faye's door open and poked his head in. Nothing was wrong there, but it was strange to see this room so empty too. He felt as if the ship were just some large empty shell, floating around aimlessly. As he was about to shut the door, something caught his eye and he quickly propped the door open again. Shining in the dim, flickering light of the match was Faye's beta tape player. She had forgotten it or maybe left it on purpose. Jet sighed and walked in the room, remembering the long voyage he had made in search of just this kind of relic. How surprising it had been to realize that he and Spike had trekked all that way and gotten the wrong kind of videotape player. He shook his head a little and sat down on the bed. The videotape was still there; he could see it through the little door on the front of the machine. Jet stood up again and walked quietly out of the room; he wasn't interested in viewing the tape, but he felt better knowing it was there. It was as if now he could say, see, she lived here. As if he had needed proof. Thinking about that, he thought that everyone had left so quickly and so close together, that the sudden silence and emptiness made it seem hard to believe that anyone besides himself had ever really been here. Suppose it had all been a dream? Massaging his head, he made his way back to the couch. It hadn't all been a dream and he had just figured out why he had awoken so suddenly. He flung himself back down on the couch and closed his eyes. It hadn't been a noise that had woken him...it was the silence. Even at night, the Bebop's crew couldn't seem to settle down and shut up. He remembered how it had bothered him at first, but then, he must have gotten used to it without noticing. He chuckled a little, thinking over all the noises that had lulled him to sleep, like Spike's heavy breathing and little squeaks now and then, as if he were dreaming like a dog: about chasing something and catching it. Sometimes, he would twitch in his sleep, causing the old couch to creak in the most obnoxious ways. Ein had a tendency to whimper softly, which would sometimes escalate to louder whining and maybe even a series of short yaps. That really used to drive Jet insane. Faye, who with the recent return of her memory hadn't slept much at all, had a way of rolling around a lot. And in the past few nights, it had been the faint humming sound of the beta tape player that he had heard. He sighed and shifted around on the narrow couch, trying to find the most comfortable position. Jet rolled back over the other way and thought hard. He knew there were these new tapes out...things you could have to listen to as you fell asleep. He had thought they were all a load of crap, with their soothing sounds and corny titles, like "Ocean Tide" and "Seagulls Talking". The ones that especially made him laugh, were the ones like "Nature at Night" and the parody that had been made of it, "Sleeping With Bears." That had gotten a wide reception of views and most didn't like it, but Jet thought it was hysterical, even if practically no one knew what a bear was anymore. But Jet thought now that he would like to have one of those tapes, only the one he wanted would have been the corniest of all: "A Bunch of People and Their Dog Making Annoying Noises As You Attempt Sleep." Somehow, he doubted one like that existed. He shifted his weight, ignoring the squeals of protest from the beat up couch and lay still. After a while, he fell back into a deep sleep. 


	2. An Old Friend

Disclaimer: I forgot to put this part on my last chapter...(please don't sue me!!!) so here it is: I do not own Cowboy Bebop, even though I wish I did. =^_^=

Chapter Two: An Old Friend

The next morning, he awoke and stretched, yawning widely. God, it was quiet. He didn't know what to do next. He didn't know what to do at all anymore. Maybe he'd sell the Bebop and try to find another job, one with lots of people maybe. Jet shook his head mournfully, the Bebop was almost like a person to him; he just _couldn't_ sell it. A sudden movement on the screen of the computer caught his eye. Someone was trying to send him a message, Jet thought and jumped up. Leaning against the table, he stared at the screen, a look of dumb amazement appearing on his face and then he smiled suddenly. Little faces were showing up clearly, accessing the codes and passwords of his computer. But the sight of someone hacking into his computer did not upset Jet, instead he threw back his head and laughed. 

"Ed! Ed..." He called and suddenly there she was, here smile filling the whole screen. He laughed, knowing that she was pressing her little face against the screen. 

"It's Jet!" she giggled, and went off screeching _vrooom, vrooom!_

Jet shrugged, slipping back into his old face of puzzled annoyance. "What do you want, Ed?"

"Just to say hi! How's the Bebop?"

"Good...quiet," he answered honestly. 

Ed looked pleased. "Ed's gone, Ed's gone," she sang out. "Bebop is quiet without Ed!" Somewhere behind her, a dog barked. "Ein's gone, Ed's gone, Bebop is quiet!" Ed sang on lustily. 

Jet grinned, "how's Ein?"

"Ein is huuuunnnngrryyyy," Ed said promptly and reached over to toss Ein some bit of food. "Ed found her father," Ed announced proudly. 

"That's good. I figured that's where you went..." he trailed off. 

"Yup. Ed found him all by herself. Oh, with Ein's help. Only a little bit though."

"Is he nice to you?"

"Oh, yes, Ed's daddy is very nice. He plays lotsa games with Ed," she told him happily. Well, he couldn't ask for much more than that. 

"Good, good..."

"How are ya Jet?" She asked suddenly, pressing her face against the screen again, as if to see inside his mind. 

"Me? Oh, uh...I'm all right." That was the truth...mostly. 

"Ed misses you."

"Yeah? I...uh...I've missed you too," he said, unable to get the words out quite right. Embarrassed, he quickly added, "it's been really quiet, you know."

Ignoring his obvious trouble with just this simple proclamation of feelings, Ed surged ahead. "Where's Spike and Faye? Ed misses them a lot too." 

"Well..." he paused, wondering how to break the news. This would have been so much easier in person. Jet reconsidered, no, in person was just as hard. Maybe harder. He had never been very open with his feelings, never been a big hugger and crier or lover. He had always been able to say things so bluntly-to anyone. Anyone at all, but now...seeing her trusting face staring at him, he hesitated. She was so young, so innocent. How could he be so cruel and tell her the fate of her friend Spike? How could he _not_ tell her? Jet wished Faye were here to handle this. He wished even harder that Spike was still alive, still here on the Bebop to glare at Ed and ask nonchalantly where she'd been, as if it didn't matter to him, as if Spike didn't care, hadn't been worried.

Ed stared at him, "Jet?"

"Uh, well..." this was one of the hardest things he had ever done. Jet took a deep breath and rubbed the bald part of his head, "they're both gone."

"Jet's all alone?" She asked, incredulous. 

"Yeah...they both took off a few days after you left. Faye got her memory back."

"Hm, that's good," she muttered distantly. She knew instinctively he wasn't telling her something. 

Jet hurried on, "yes. I think she was glad." Even though she hadn't been, he let the words slip out, rushing over each other like a waterfall. He couldn't seem to stop talking now. "She didn't tell me where she was going. Maybe back home."

Ed nodded, "maybe. What about Spike?"

"He...uh, left too. He had to solve his past...I'm sure he did it to. He put everything behind him at last."

Ed smiled, satisfied. How fraught with meaning those sentences had been, Jet mused. Spike had left, but not just the Bebop. He had left the universe of the living. Spike had solved his past, but now Spike was in the past, never to return. Jet sighed sadly, Spike was a person of the past. He didn't exist anywhere anymore. 

"Where is he now?" Ed asked. 

"Somewhere in the heavens," Jet remarked carefully. He let Ed interpret that the way she wanted. He felt sure Spike was in heaven, if such a place was real. 

Ed nodded, thinking he meant somewhere in space. "He's probably having a great time," she said quietly. 

That made Jet smile a little, picturing Spike as an angel. He was sure Spike was complaining the whole time...about the dress, about the halo, the harp and everything else. "Yes. I'm sure he is having the time of his life." 

"Ed wishes he wasn't gone," Ed said, her usual cheerfulness gone. 

"Me too, Ed. Me too."

"I wish I could have seen him one last time," she added. Maybe she had figured it out after all. It sounded like she knew. 

"He liked you a lot," Jet said, feeling that Ed deserved to know. 

"Ed knows."

"When you left...you should have seen his face."

"Well he should see Ed's face now!!" She cried and he looked up at the screen again. He had been avoiding her gaze, but he glanced up in time to see her rub one hand across her face.

"Don't be sad..." 

"I'm not," she lied quickly. "Ein just keeps licking me." Ein was no where to be seen. 

"Did you want to come back to the Bebop?"

"I can't. Thanks though, Jet." Jet noticed she had stopped talking in third person. He nodded and she went on. "I really should stay with my dad, but I'll talk to you again, okay?"

"Okay. Promise?"

"Yup, Ed promises!" She said, some of her happiness reappearing. "Y'know, Ed knew something was wrong," Ed confided. "That's why Ed decided to give old Jet a call. Bye-bye!"

Jet smiled and caught himself waving at the screen. He blushed slightly and called, "bye Ed..."

And then the screen went blank. 

Howdy everybody! A short little conversation with an old friend...well, what do you guys think? i don't really know where this is going from here, so suggestions are appreciated!! i tried to keep Ed in character (i'm not even gonna tell how many times i had to fix her speech so it was in third person...-_-' ) anyways...more to come, so keep reading!! don't forget reviews are welcome!!! (obviously) Thanx so much for reading my lil ficcy!!! ^_^


	3. The Haunting Past

Disclaimer: I do not own Cowboy Bebop...that said: Enjoy!

Chapter Three: The Haunting Past

What to do now...Jet sighed and continued polishing the glass windows of the ship. Last time he had been here, he had been telling Spike a story...what was it now? Jet couldn't remember anymore-he just knew that he had told Spike he hated that story. Something about cats? No...that was Spike's story and he smiled, remembering it. He couldn't remember his own story still...something about climbing a mountain, he thought. There had been a message, but Spike hadn't listened. Where would Jet be now if Spike had listened? Would they be running away from the syndicate? Probably tracking down another fruitless bounty. 

Every room of the Bebop brought back so much, memories flooding Jet's mind until he had to sit down and carefully shift through them. He couldn't seem to get anything done, but just moved from room to room in a daze and remembered. No matter how much he laughed at himself for trying to live in the past, he just couldn't seem to shake it off. 

And it wasn't just the past with Spike, Faye, Ed and Ein...it was his whole past. He kept thinking about being Black Dog and working for the police. He kept remembering his "friend" that had caused the loss of his arm. It was as if he now had time to think about his whole life...stuff he hadn't thought about in years. He wondered how Alisa was getting on. He could have gone to visit her again, but there was nothing left for him to say to her. Besides, he had turned in her new boyfriend, Rhint, so they weren't exactly on good terms. Jet stopped polishing and wondered where she was now and if Rhint had ever come back. He hoped the two of them were happy together. Maybe they had even settled down somewhere and had a family. It seemed weird to him to imagine Alisa with kids. If things had gone differently, Jet could have been the one married to her. But it wasn't the right kind of life for him...he knew that, so why did he keep thinking about it? 

He sighed and considered for the second time the possibility of selling the Bebop. What good were memories? Moping around and wandering from room to room wouldn't fix anything. It wouldn't bring Spike or Faye back. Jet put away the cleaning supplies and walked the length of the ship, once, twice, three times. Back and forth, back and forth, backforthbackforth...there was so much to remember. The Bebop was a part of himself. He knew everything about it, could find his way around in the dark, knew all the noises it made and it had been his home for so long now. He couldn't remember how long. As a matter of fact, Jet Black couldn't remember much about life before the Bebop, before Spike. It was strange to live here without him. Spike had always been here, ever since that day they had first met and grudgingly gained respect for one another. It wasn't until the moment when Spike was leaving, that Jet knew suddenly they were friends through it all. It was true...Jet hadn't really taken the time to think about his friendship with Spike. He had taken that for granted without realizing it. But now that it was so quiet and he could finally hear himself think, he realized that he had always liked Spike, had always thought of him as someone he could count on. Not that he would have admitted it out loud ever, but still...the friendship was there.

_I don't like being here...alone. _Jet thought, something that he would never have guessed just a few weeks ago. He had always considered himself such a solitary person. A group of one. Suddenly it seemed he was much more dependent on human care than he ever would have suspected. He had a sudden longing to get off this ship, make a new start, find some other job that didn't involve risking his neck everyday. _But then,_ Jet smiled a little, _I seem to have a knack for ending up with those kind of jobs. _

He sunk down into the nearest chair and then jumped back up again. How long had his bonsai garden gone without watering? He had totally forgotten about his plants in the light of these past few weeks! He chuckled, remembering how Ed had flooded this room when he had asked her to water for him. There was no one who loved these trees like Jet Black. A few moments later, humming softly, he was happily engrossed in watering each small tree and his fingers were covered with dirt. 

"Some things never change."

Startled, Jet stopped and looked up. At first, all he saw was a tall pair of white boots and beyond that...Faye. She yawned widely and pushed a pair of sunglasses back on top of her short hair. Shocked, he just sat there and stared at her. She gave him a wry smile and leaned comfortably against the door frame. 

_Faye..._

"When's dinner?" She asked, looking ready to sling some sarcastic comment at him, as always. 

Jet stood up, convinced that if he were to walk to the table or maybe to the couch, he would bump into Spike somewhere. 

"H'lo! Jet...you there?" Faye demanded, rapping smartly on his skull. 

Jet glared at her and rubbed his head. He felt dizzy, as if the ship were flipping around in circles. He had to reach out and grab Faye's arm to steady himself. 

"Careful there, old man." In spite of her teasing, Faye looked concerned and a little bit bewildered. This was clearly not what she had been expecting. Dimly, he wondered why she had come back...what exactly she was expecting from him. 

The world still seemed to be spinning. He was reminded suddenly of Spike's two different eyes, because Jet felt as if he were seeing two different images and he couldn't quite manage to see where one ended and the other began. Spike was dead, said one eye. No, if he just walked out to the couch, Spike would be there...sleeping or smoking, said the other. And Faye...she had come back and was standing here. Or maybe she had never left. He thought he remembered her leaving...but the other eye told him she was just hungry, she had never left, never would. They would cruise around, the five of them...forever. And louder than all of that, something inside him was indescribably glad to see her and he realized he still had not said anything. 

"Faye-you..." he heard himself begin. 

Faye blinked and pried his fingers from her arm. "Oh good! You're not catatonic after all...really, Jet! You ought to work on your people skills. Maybe you could learn how to treat a guest too."

He still couldn't seem to grasp reality. 

Faye surged forward, talking on and on. He only caught part of her tirade. She was the same as always, he thought, unable to repress a grin. "-and that day you 'came to my rescue', you locked me in a bathroom, of all places! How can you expect to make any friends if you lock all your guests up? Someday I'll lock your stupid ass in a bathroom and see how you like it! That will teach you how to treat a guest! And just now...I could have hit you over the head with a brick and you wouldn't have noticed-"

"My bonsai trees!" Jet broke in suddenly and turned away from Faye quickly. He grasped the hose and managed to turn it off, but the water level seemed to be rising anyways. Jet caught a glimpse of Faye's surprised face and started laughing. He couldn't help it...he had just flooded his precious trees! He realized he was laughing alone and stopped abruptly. 

"Well? Don't just stand there, stupid...grab a mop and help!"

Faye sighed and to his surprise, took the mob he held out to her. Soon after, the room was only 'pleasantly damp', not to mention clean. Faye had long worn out her welcome and was complaining again. 

"Shut up." Jet said automatically and saw Faye staring, looking hurt. 

"You're not listening."

"No."

"I was asking if you'd be interested in letting me stay here, on the ship again," she paused and looked worried. Thinking maybe she shouldn't have asked, Faye added quickly, "just a short while...y'kno, 'til I get back on my feet again."

"How'd you get in?" Jet asked, suddenly realizing he had no idea. 

"It was easy," Faye said in a loftily superior tone. "I've parked here so often, it was no problem...besides, the ship's not moving very fast. I ran out of fuel and you were the closest around. I was worried..." she trailed off.

"Why's that?"

"I tried talking to you, but no one was responding and the ship was moving so slow. I thought...well, something could have happened to you, so I came in," Faye said defensively, since Jet was glaring at her. 

"I can take care of myself," he heard himself say more gruffly than he had intended. But it had taken him by surprise...it wasn't like Faye to be worried about him after all. 

"Right, right...well...I'm still out of fuel and you were still the closest one around."

Jet pushed past her, leaving Faye fumbling for words. He didn't know what to say to her...she was so different. He was so different. Everything and everyone had changed. What was it that she had said to him? Oh...that's right, _everything's falling apart Jet. It's not just us. _Or something to that extent. Well, his life had fallen apart years before. It hadn't stopped him then, he just moved on. As if she knew what he were thinking, Faye called angrily, "I see right through you, Jet Black! And contrary to your personal belief, you're not made of stone!"

"Are you staying, then?" Jet asked tonelessly. 

Faye scowled at him and kicked the floor. Finally she replied, "only for a while."

_Great...now I'm stuck with this wench again..._He sighed, _she'll probably make me repair her ship _again_ and supply her with fuel... _Jet couldn't help wondering how "that woman" managed to wreck her ship so often and how did she manage to be so god-damn annoying? He caught himself thinking, _if only she'd go away soon, so I could hear myself think. I really should travel alone- _and remembered suddenly that hearing himself think was what had made him so depressed. He made dinner without paying much attention to it and when he sat down with Faye to eat, she was silent and brooding. 

"Look...I-uh, well...I'm...sorry that I wasn't very nice, um, earlier-" God this was hard. Faye glared at him. "And...uh, well, I was just surprised to see you again and all."

"You told me to give you a call and come back anytime," Faye pouted, but she seemed happy again underneath her sarcastic exterior. 

"Yeah, well...you surprised me," he repeated lamely. 

"Should I give you a three months warning next time before I happen to run out of fuel in your personal section of the universe?" She snapped. 

Jet gave in and laughed, glad to be laughing with an old friend again. Faye saw the funny side of it and joined in.

"Believe it or not...I've actually kinda missed you," Faye said awkwardly. 

"Well...it's been pretty uneventful without you bugging me."

She smiled back and slowly, Jet felt himself coming back to the present. It was time to move on with his life...it was time to put the pieces back together and go forward again. At least now, he had a friend to help him. And that made all the difference in the world.

Well...kind of a long chapter, but I had a really hard time trying to figure out where to end it!! . Anyways...basically, a few Jet revelations and back: Faye-Faye!! Let me know what you think of this part...if you have any suggestions for what to have happen next, send 'em along. Oh, and if anyone thinks of any good sarcastic Faye comments, send those along too! Thanx oh so much, keep reading, and more coming soon! ~CronoCat ^.^


	4. That Shrew Woman

Disclaimer: Cowboy Bebop does not belong to me *siiiiiiigh* , although this story _does _(HA!)

Chapter 4: A Few Plans And That Shrew Woman

Jet Black...what are you going to do with yourself? He knew the period of mourning was over...or _should _be. It was time to move on. Jet asked himself severely again, what are you going to do, but it was like talking to a brick wall. There was no answer, which left Jet pounding savagely on the solid redness. That was all nonsense, of course, but it was about the way he felt. He peeked in on Faye-sound asleep. Well, he thought, at least one of us is all right. Because now, he couldn't sleep anymore. Maybe it was because he'd spent the last few weeks in a daze, sleeping more and more and when awake, he was day-dreaming. 

Jet stood silent again, leaning against Faye's door and thinking hard. He knew it was time to stop letting himself wallow in the past and he knew that he was strong enough now to put it behind him. He wouldn't allow the past to consume him, as it had Spike. It would be hard...but Jet was used to that. It was time to acknowledge his past and then put it where it belonged: behind him. Spike had been a once in a life-time friend and Jet would never forget him. 

A plan. He had to formulate some kind of plan. Maybe Faye could help...well, he grinned wryly in the dark, at least she could tell him what not to do. He roused her, oblivious to the fact that it was the middle of the night and some people needed their sleep, for God's sake! In the warm, pale yellow light, the two settled themselves around the old table, Faye resting her head against the back of the couch. 

"Faye?"

"Mmm?" She muttered, opening one eye to look at him and then shutting it promptly. 

He fell silent, not sure what to say and instead studied her short, tousled hair. Faye looked over, yawning and sat up. "Well? Is there a reason you are depriving me of my sleep?"

There was something about Faye that made Jet want to be sarcastic and rude. He almost said, no, I just felt like waking you up, dragging you out here and making you clean the ship right now. But instead, he said, "I was just thinking..."

"Oh, that is a good reason to wake me up!" Faye interrupted, holding her hands up like a picture frame and making a clicking noise. "Wait-lemme take a picture of this rare occurrence! Yes, folks...I believe Jet Black has had a thought! Can you tell me, Sir," she leaned forward towards him, "what strange thought happened to find its way into that bald head of yours?"

Jet glared at her, "I see sleep deprivation doesn't affect your sense of tact." 

"Nope. I'm still my usual charming self."

Jet shook his head-that stupid shrew woman! Why had he even woken her up? Why had he ever thought for an instant she would help him plan what to do next? "Never mind. Just go back to sleep." He stood up to leave. 

"Oh fine...I'm curious now. Besides, I'm wide awake. What's bothering you?"

"Nothing. I'm just trying to decide what to do next, but since you'd be perfectly happy just sleeping on this ship, I shouldn't have troubled you."

"Jet...wait!" Faye called quickly. He turned around, "is there something you thought we should do instead? I don't mean to just stay here for the rest of my life, but it's just that I don't have anywhere else to go..."

He sighed, "neither do I...but I just want..." But Jet didn't know what it was that he "just wanted".

Faye shrugged. "What's wrong with staying here on the Bebop?"

"I can't. I can't stay here anymore...I'll just keep moping around, wishing Spike would come back and we could be bounty hunters again. I think...I think I'm actually getting tired of it all. I don't like living here anymore."

Faye stared. " You don't like 'living here anymore'?!" She echoed, incredulous. "And just where did you plan to go instead?"

"I don't know."

"You can't, Jet! You belong here...on the Bebop," Faye said, almost pleading. 

"No I don't," Jet said stubbornly. He loved his ship and he had enjoyed being a bounty hunter. But he couldn't do it anymore. Spike's death was too present here...like another person on the ship that sat with him, ate with them. Jet couldn't escape it. "There's nothing to do here, Faye."

"We could still be bounty hunters! I know I'm not the..." she paused, brushing a strand of hair from her eyes, "the partner that Spike was, but I'm not...so bad. I-"

"It's not you," Jet spoke up. "I just don't want to be a bounty hunter anymore, that's all."

"So what?! So that's just IT?! You're just going to throw it all away then!"

Jet slowly shook his head. "Well, if I'm not a bounty hunter, then what the hell am I supposed to do, Faye? Sit around and water my bonsai trees all day?!"

"Don't be stupid. I just think you ought to think about what you're saying...that's all. And what about me?"

"You? I don't know...what about you?"

"For God's sake, Jet! Try not to be so damn uncaring for once, okay?! I happen to have no where to go...I happen to be alone and you're the only one who can help me. You're the only one who I can," her voice broke and she said more softly, "the only one I can call a friend now."

Jet sat, shocked into silence. She was right. They both didn't have anyone else anymore and here he had been forcing her to help him plan out the rest of his life for him. He hadn't thought to make a space for her in this new life of his. How could he be so selfish? Hadn't he just been thinking how lucky he was to have a friend again? Some friend he was turning out to be. 

"Faye-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"Shut up. I don't care," Faye announced and stormed out of the room. "Just sell the stupid ship and move to Pluto, it doesn't matter anyway!!"

Jet sighed...he'd really blown that. He wished he'd been able to explain, but those kind of words didn't seem to be ones that were easy to get out. He hoped Faye would understand what he wished he had said once she calmed down.

Well, it took me forever, but here it finally is! My fourth chapter...YAY! i'm so proud of me...i apologize for the chapter title: i know it's corny . but i really couldn't think of anything else at the moment...stupid mental block! anyways, i hope everyone liked this chapter. it was rather interesting to write, what with faye's smart remarks and so-forth. Questions? Comments? Write to me!! (lol, that's on the back of the cereal box...i'm so odd...) but really, send me reviews if you liked it or if you didn't. And ideas for what to do next...(even tho i already wrote the next chapter, mwhahahahaha) yes, no more sugar for me, i promise. Adios folks!


	5. Stars

Disclaimer: Guess what! I _still don't _happen to own the characters or storyline of Cowboy Bebop. Amazing...^_~

Chapter 5: Stars

The next day, Faye barely talked to him. He wanted to throw something heavy at her and tell her to stop sulking. Instead, he acted as if nothing had happened. All in all, he was pretty good at it. It was at dinner that he finally gave in. The peace and quiet was nice, but he felt he should try to talk to Faye once more...before he finalized any plans to sell the ship and all.

"Faye, I-" he began hesitantly. Mutely, she handed him a glass to pour his drink in. "Uh, thanks, but I-" She pushed everything else on the table, excluding her plate towards him and faced that other way again, silent as the lingering presence of Spike. This was going to drive him crazy. "Listen, I didn't mean to be so...um, uncaring, as you said, the other day."

"Is this an apology?" Faye asked. He shrugged, then shook his head and finally gave a small nod. She glared at him. "Let's see you grovel a little...maybe then I'll forgive you."

"No...that's my apology, deal with it."

She sighed, "fine." And sat silent for the rest of the meal. But at least now, it was a comfortable silence and Jet relaxed, noticing that Faye wasn't sitting quite so rigidly now, though she still wasn't talking. He wondered morbidly if she would be as upset if he or Ed were to die. Or was it just that she had loved Spike? Jet suspected as much, although he'd never said anything. It was too bad, really, that Spike had been so caught up in the past, in memories of Julia. But Faye had never complained...she had never mentioned it, but Jet figured she had to have loved him, at least a tiny bit. Not that it mattered too much now. The problem with death was that old feelings didn't disappear with a person. Even though Spike didn't exist anymore, Faye still probably loved him. Jet knew _he _still loved Spike...well, what he meant by that was that Spike had been his best friend and Jet missed him. Too bad he couldn't have expressed anything like that while Spike was still alive. Was this the point of death? To make you realize how much you cared about a person, now that they were gone? Suppose everyone was like him in some small way; suppose no one ever told anyone how much they cared until it was too late. What a strange life...ashes to ashes: it was a lonely cycle. After he finished eating, Jet got up and walked to the nearest window. He heard Faye's footsteps following him. 

"I don't regret meeting him," he said softly, knowing Faye would understand who he meant. 

Faye nodded, "he was...one of the best friends I've ever had..." Her eyes clouded and she turned her head away. Jet turned his eyes back to the stars, giving her some privacy. 

"Before he died...there was a shaman guy that I visited."

"Oh?" 

"He said...oh, something about stars."

Faye joined him at the window, peering out at the stars. 

"When you die...a star falls, that's what he said."

"Everyone has a star then?"

"That's what he said."

"I wonder which one is mine," Faye mused, staring out the window. 

Jet said nothing, just continued looking outside. 

"Don't you wonder?"

"No." He didn't...he just wished Spike wasn't gone. There was an emptiness inside him that still hadn't gone away. It strangely upset him that the emptiness inside himself was not echoed in the sky, in the heavens or anywhere in the universe.

"Oh. Well, I never saw a star fall...the shaman was probably full of shit," Faye announced and he could see her wanting to believe Spike was alive somewhere, wanting to believe she could rescue him and coax him back to life. 

"Faye...stars falling or not, Spike is dead," he said bluntly, crushing any of her dreams of rescuing Spike from Vicious or the Syndicate. 

"I...know...but-" she said brokenly and fell silent, rubbing her eyes. 

"Do you believe in heaven?"

Faye shrugged, "not really."

"If it exists...he's there..."

"Of course he is. Spike was a good guy, no matter what else he was," Faye said quickly, sounding like he had been suggesting Spike was a horrible person. 

Jet sighed..._Spike...why did you leave us? You were dead all along and you let yourself make friends, you let us become attached to you...a dead man. How could you..._

"I miss him, but..." Faye paused and then said in a loud, clear voice, "I'm glad I had a chance to meet him and get to know him."

"Yeah...me too," Jet echoed, wishing he could express it so well. He thought again about no one ever expressing how important someone else was until it was too late. But did it always have to be that way? Could no one break the cycle? Couldn't he? Jet sighed slowly; if Faye were to die right now, he would not have had a chance to say to her all that he wanted to say. But it was hard, so very hard to speak up. "...it was..." he searched desperately for the words he wanted so very badly to say. "It was...fun, while it lasted," he finally managed, feeling incredibly stupid. _Fun? _It was _fun_? What was wrong with him?

Faye laughed quietly and shook her head, "fun, huh. Well..." she paused, then shrugged, still laughing, "yeah, I guess it was..._fun._"

Jet gave up. Besides-Faye seemed to have a pretty good handle on the things he _actually_ said, and the things he _meant_.

" Well, Faye...you're welcome to stay here...but I was planning to sell it. The Bebop and...everything."

Faye nodded shortly, not smiling so much anymore.

"I'm not a bounty hunter. I just can't do that anymore..." he trailed off, unable to explain. He felt the need for a brand new beginning and he wasn't going to get it as a bounty hunter. Besides, it didn't bring in enough cash. He would be broke before long. Feeding Spike, Faye, Ed and Ein had cut into the money he had set aside; there wouldn't be any money left soon. How much longer could he have gone on this way: fighting and killing, all to make a bit of extra cash. _Spike would understand, _Jet thought suddenly. _He would understand why I have to sell it and do something different._

"Where will you go?" Faye asked, cutting into his thoughts.

But Jet had no answer for that yet, except to say that she was welcome to come with him, wherever it might be that he ended up. She thanked him distantly and after a while, retired to her room. He couldn't help thinking again: how oddly the new situation was like before, an altered reality. Some people believed in different dimensions...other worlds where a version of yourself lived and went about life, with only subtle differences in their lives from the reality that you knew. Maybe, in some other dimension, Jet Black had never met Spike Spiegel. Where was that version of himself now? Jet almost wished _he_ could be in that dimension now. But would he really be happier having never met Spike? Certainly it was better to have had a chance to know him and lose him than to never have known he existed. Jet shook his head impatiently; he didn't believe in that kind of crap anyways. No use wasting his time wondering about his life in other dimensions. His life in _this _dimension was hard enough. 

It was better now that he planned what to do next, instead of thinking of endless _what ifs _of the past. Tomorrow...perhaps then he could see about selling the Bebop. Faye might have some ideas about where he could make a good profit and find someone who would...well, who would love the ship as much as he did. The buyer would have to promise to take good care of it. But, as much as it hurt him to sell the Bebop, Jet knew he would never be able to move on otherwise. Maybe someday, he could buy it back or get another nice ship. For now, he would sell it and...what about a job? He thought for a moment...he had already tried being a policeman, already been a bounty hunter. Where to go now? Maybe a policeman again...or he could look into hiring himself out as some kind of detective. He'd probably be pretty good at that kind of work. If not, Jet was confident he'd find something. He might even go back to school and learn how to do something completely different.

And then there was Faye. She needed a friend and a place to stay. He considered the possibility of the two of them finding someplace to stay together. But that almost seemed too much like playing house-little Jet coming home to his happy wife. The idea was laughable; and besides, Faye would never go along with that. But they could rent some kind of house together until she got back on her feet. After that...well, it would be nice to know she was nearby and that he could always go visit someone who had been through all the same experiences, who would understand what he was dealing with and feeling, who was as unconnected from the rest of the universe as he. So that wasn't too bad, all things considered. 

Then there was always Ed, of course. Jet felt confident she wouldn't stay with her no-good father for long even though, at the moment, she liked him. Maybe someday, Ed would also need a place to go. The three of them could live together, or in homes close to one another. He would call her tomorrow morning to see what she thought.

Eventually Jet turned away from the window and made his way back to the couch. He would take all the furniture with him when he left. It was comforting to think that after he moved off the Bebop, he could still be sleeping on this annoyingly noisy couch. Jet smiled and drifted into a deep sleep, his last thought that it was nice to be moving on, to have something to do again. 

In the middle of the night, he awoke, feeling that he had forgotten something. He went over all his plans, but everything seemed to be pretty much in order. Somehow though, he just wasn't satisfied. It wasn't that he no longer felt connected, because there was Faye now. He crept to her room and peered in, smiling when he saw her sprawled out and snoring softly. She looked happy enough. _We will be just fine,_ he thought, as the realization that he was really going to sell his ship and move away sunk in. But Faye looked so content, so confident in her sleep even, that he was reassured. It seemed ironically funny to him that Alisa had hated him for always being so right. He hoped he was doing the right thing now...Jet had never felt so unsure of himself before. After a moment, he shut the door and walked back to the huge window in the other room. 

From the kitchen came the faint strains of the radio: he must have left it on, although he no longer needed it's noise to lull him to sleep. Looking out into the sky, he thought he saw one star twinkle and fall. From the radio came the distant lyrics of a song: "_'Cause tomorrow's another day_

And I'm thirsty anyway

So bring on the rain...

And I am not afraid

So bring on the rain*"

Jet leaned closer and whispered softly, glad to finally have some closure. 

"_So Long, Cowboy..."_

*Unfortunately, I have been unable to figure out who this song is by so I will just say, I don't own it, nor did I make it up. It's a real song, written and belonging to someone else, about facing the next day and being strong. 

************

I FINISHED IT! WOHOO!! lol-i'm so happy now...sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out-what with the whole site crashing and all. But here it is: my ending chapter!! It was just a little longer than i was planning, but oh well...what did everyone think? i had a better chapter title this time!! but seriously, i hope people liked the actual chapter, not just the title...-_-' send me reviews, pleaseeeeeee?! *_* they make me happy! I really hope everyone enjoyed my "rfb fic that's real!!" lol...thanx for reviewing me everybody! it really means a lot to me! farewell ~CronoCat =^_^=


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